Universal consciousness cannot be summoned, cannot be controlled, cannot be claimed. You can merge with it, can join it, can drop the points of separation between yourself and its nature, but you can’t change what it is.
In the end, all the stories of the great spiritual heroes recount the tales of their sitting in the deep, great silence, listening to the resonance of the Soham and witnessing its mystery.
Over the course of your spiritual life, you will find that awakening is like being drawn into the sun—awesome beyond words, awesome beyond all understanding. But as your attention goes deeper and deeper, all your fear will drop away as you find that this process of absorption is not what you expect, not the end of life, but the beginning of a true eternal life.